Your Conversation Navigator

This guide will help you navigate the conversation with pointers of what to say and how to say it. But it is up to you to work it into a natural dialogue.

You know your kids. Be sensitive to what is appropriate for their maturity level and attention span. We recommend weaving this content into many interactive conversations instead of one long lesson.

Click through the navigator below. Then hit “continue” to start the conversation.

Know the Case

Before educating others, you must have clarity yourself on why abortion is wrong. Start with these three lines:

  1. It is wrong to intentionally kill innocent human beings.
  2. Elective abortion intentionally kills innocent human beings.
  3. Therefore, elective abortion is wrong.

Bring Photos

Because a picture truly is worth 1,000 words, well-chosen photos can quickly advance dialogue. For young children, we recommend using images of babies developing in the womb as evidence of their humanity.

Prepare for Truth

Before someone can use a navigation system, they need to know how it works. Similarly, to better lead your children in finding truth, it’s important they understand what it means for something to be true.

Truth is telling it like it is. It’s when what you say or think matches the real world. For example, imagine two people look at a blade of grass. One says, “That’s a blade of grass.” The other says, “No, that’s a human being.” The first person’s statement is true. The other is not.

Anyone can discover what is true. Let your kids know it is a good thing to question what others say. They should be like detectives who want to investigate the real world to find out what is true.

Point to Truth

Next, focus on the foundational truth of parental responsibility. Introduce the truth and then go deeper.

Ask: “Do you think it’s a good thing for me to take care of you?” They’ll say, “Yes.” Then say, “You’re right. You’re my child, and that means it’s my job to take care of you. All parents should take care of their kids.”

Next say, “Parents taking care of their kids includes those not yet born.”

To explain, ask, “Did you know babies inside their mothers are growing?” This is a good time to show them pictures of the preborn baby’s growth. Then say, “Dead things don’t grow. So, since the baby is growing, she must be alive.”

Next, ask: “Do you think it’s possible for a pregnant mom to give birth to a kitten?” They’ll probably laugh and say, “No!” 

Then say, “You’re right. All living creatures make babies that are the same kind of creature as them. That’s how we know a baby inside a human has to be a human, too.”

Finally, summarize, “Here’s what we know so far: Parents should take care of their children. And, if a mom is pregnant, she has a child living inside her. So that means parents should take care of their preborn kids.”

For more on this, check out our Questions about Abortion.

Ask, “What if someone said that parents only need to take care of some of their kids, like just the boys and not the girls or just the tall ones and not the short ones? Would that be okay?”

You might need to try a few illustrations, but eventually they’ll say, “No, that’s wrong.”

Respond, “You’re right. Differences—like being a boy or girl, tall or short—don’t matter when it comes to responsibilities parents have to take care of their kids.”

Then say, “Did you know preborn babies are different from you? And some people think these differences mean parents don’t need to take care of preborn babies. Let’s look at these differences together.” 

The four differences are: Size, Level of development, Environment, Degree of dependency (remember the acronym SLED–see Scott Klusendorf’s The Case for Life).

Click each category below to explore with your child.

Say, “Preborn babies are a lot smaller than you. They start out about the size of a grain of sand! But being small isn’t a bad thing, is it? And it’s not the baby’s fault she’s so small.”

Then say, “It would be wrong for parents only to care for their tall kids and not their short ones, right? In the same way, if a mom is pregnant, it would also be wrong for her only to care for her bigger born kids and not her smaller preborn baby.”

Say, “There are a lot of things you can do that preborn babies can’t.” Make a list together. Examples: walking, talking, playing games, reading, and so on.

Next say, “But kids your age also can’t do things that someone 16 years old can do.” Again, make a list together: driving, getting a job, etc.

Then say, “What if a dad had a 16-year-old son and another kid your age? Imagine the dad only cared for the teenager but not the kid your age. That would be wrong, wouldn’t it? Especially because the kid your age needs more care than the teenager. In the same way, if a mom is pregnant, she should care not only for kids your age but also her preborn baby.”

Say, “Babies have a very special place to live: inside their mothers. And parents should take care of their kids no matter where they are.”

Say, “Imagine a mom had a kid your age at home and a teenager who goes to school. During the day, they’re in different places. What if the mom only cared for the teenager who goes to school but not the toddler at home? That would be wrong, wouldn’t it? Especially because the toddler needs more care than the teenager. In the same way, if a mom is pregnant, she should take care not only of her kid your age but also the younger one living inside her.”

Ask, “Do you need me? What do I do for you that you can’t do for yourself?” Make a list together. Examples: providing food, transportation, a home, etc.

Say, “Did you know preborn babies need their moms even more than you do? But that just means it’s even more important that their mothers take care of them.”

Say, “Imagine a dad had a newborn baby and a ten-year-old son. Both need him. What if he only took care of the ten-year-old and not the newborn? That would be wrong, wouldn’t it? In the same way, a pregnant mom who has other kids should care for all who need her—not just her older kids who need her less.”

Highlight the Wrong Route

You don’t have to explain everything about abortion to point your kids to the truth that it’s wrong. Assess not only your kids’ intellectual ability but also emotional capacity in the conversation to decide how far to go.

Regardless of how you convey abortion—see ideas below based on maturity levels—it will be important to emphasize to your children that you will always care for them and would never consider doing this to them. They must know they are protected.

Say, “Some people think parents only need to care for their born children but not their preborn babies. When you hear that, remember what we discussed—that parents should care for all their kids.” 

Also say, “A newborn baby needs her mom more than you. And that means the mom should give even greater care to the newborn. The same is true with the preborn baby, who is even younger and weaker than the newborn. The weaker you are, the more your parents should care for you.”

Say, “Some parents choose not to care for their preborn babies. But the only way to stop caring for a baby inside her mother is to have her killed. This is called ‘abortion.’”

Then say, “Remember when we discussed how parents should care for all their kids—not just some of them? In abortion, parents are refusing to care for one of their children. This is wrong.”

Also say, “But abortion is more than not caring for a child. It’s killing her. If it’s wrong for a parent not to feed their baby, it is even worse for a parent to kill her. That’s what happens in abortion.”

Prepare for Detours

Your children may have a lot of questions as you seek truth together. Here are a couple common ones.

When you say parents should care for all their kids, your child might ask, “What about adoption? Is that wrong, too, because parents choosing adoption aren’t caring for their baby anymore?”

In response, clarify that a parent placing her child for adoption is caring for the baby. For various reasons, the baby’s birth parents have decided that adoption is a better solution for the child. This is an act of sacrifice for the baby—unlike abortion, which is an act of sacrificing the baby herself.

Some children are skeptical and thus more prone to question what you teach them. Refer back to “Prepare for Truth” above. Commend them, saying it is good to question what they hear. Then remind them what it means for something to be true. 

Explain that if someone says, “The preborn baby is a human” and another says, “The preborn baby is not a human,” these statements can’t both be true. Your job is to find out which, if either, of these is true. 

Finally, commit to working with them to find out what actually is true about the point they’re challenging.

For help, see our Questions About Abortion.